Sunglasses
by queenofthelooneybin
Summary: Little drabbles centered on everyone seeing those sunglasses on Hannah's head. Written in response to that little scene.
1. Booth

After watching The Bones That Weren't, I had to write this. Because I was shocked.

Hannah was such a bitch! What a child, demanding Brennan give her the sunglasses. What is her problem? Bitch! That was all I could say.

It was like I was stuck on repeat. That was all I could say.

Bitch!

So this is how I am working out my anger.

Xxx

Chapter One: Booth

He recognized them as soon as he saw them.

Perched on top of his girlfriend's head were Bones' sunglasses.

And he was hit by a wave of confusion.

Brennan had brought those sunglasses years ago, when they had gone to Vegas for a case. He remembered the moment that she had obtained them. They had been in the airport, and she had been rooting through her bag. She had forgotten her sunglasses. So he had decided to zip over to the duty free shop and picked out a pair he thought she would like.

And she had worn them ever since. Everyone knew they belonged to her. They had gone from case to case, those little glasses perched on her head.

They looked wrong on Hannah.

"Where did you get those?" Booth asked.

"Brennan gave them to me," Hannah said cheerfully.

"Brennan gave them to you?"

"Well, I had to remind her that giving a gift was a social custom when visiting the sick…"

Booth had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from screaming at her. What kind of person was she to demand something from someone. Not even Parker would do that. It actually pissed him off. This was the first time said emotion had popped up in their relationship. He wondered what Brennan had been thinking.

"And she just gave to you?"

"Yes Seeley. She was happy to."

Hannah went back to her laptop and Booth decided to eat some of her Jello. The more he thought about it, the more angry he got. This was just beyond any sort of words he could come up with.

"She was happy to?" he asked.

"Yes Seeley. Why are you so hung up about this? She was happy to."

I wonder how long you had to pressure her until she gave in, Booth thought and crushed the paper bowl in his hand.


	2. Angela

The bitch was going down.

Angela had known she was trouble the moment she was mentioned. No one got in the way of Brenth (combo Booth and Brennan name), as she had dubbed them.

No one.

Sure Cam had but not in this way.

Hannah had the Vegas specs on her stupid blonde head.

When Brennan had come home from Vegas, she had the sunglasses on her head. Angela had asked where she had gotten them.

_Booth picked them out._

There had been so much love in her voice, Angela had wanted to hug her and tell her to go for it. But she hadn't and now Miss Thing was in the way.

Not if Angela Montenegro Hodgins had her way. Even the baby wanted Blondie McHomewrecker to go away. She could feel it. Whenever BMcH was around, the baby would make her feel sick, the way you did when you smelled something bad. If she was still around when the baby was born, Angela would train him or her to 'go' on her.

Angela had pretended to be interested in the sunglasses. Gone up to her and asked 'where did you buy them?' And in her sugary sweet voice Hannah had said 'Bones gave them to me'.

No one but Booth called Brennan Bones. Not even Angela. Tempe would have been fine. Brennan was okay.

But Bones?

It was she was spitting in Brennan's face.

Angela wanted to lay the smackdown on her. Two things stopped her: the baby and the fact Brennan wouldn't like it.

But Angela could wait.

The living Mary Sue was going down.

And she would get away with it. After all, if any group of people could get away with murder it was the Squints.

Surely Cam would authorize it, and Daisy would be all for it.

Angela smiled and went about her day, a smile on her face.

Xxx

Note: Hannah is a canon-sue. I realized this when I was with my fiancé and when I explained what a Mary Sue was, he said 'you're my Mary Sue'.

I still don't know if I should hit him or not. It's been three days.


	3. Chapter 3

Cam wondered what the hell was going on.

First of all, Hannah was wearing the freaking sunglasses.

Cam and Booth had been dating when they had popped up and even she could see that Brennan loved those glasses, to the point of keeping them in her purse in January.

And the way Hannah had gotten them just bothered her.

It wouldn't go away. Even when she was supposed to be working, the thoughts would wiggle around in her head. Cam sat at her desk wondering.

Then it hit her.

Brennan was giving up.

The sunglasses had represented something between her and Booth. And by giving them to Hannah she was giving up. Brennan never gave up. Cam knew that they had to act fast or else things would end badly.

She had known from the start that Brennan and Booth belonged together. And she had a feeling that their relationship did not endear her to the rest of the team. Well at least to Angela and Hodgins. Zack had probably never noticed the chemistry. But she had figured she might at well have her fun while she could.

But Hannah was a serious threat to the couple. They were living together. She had followed him from a war zone. Which just brought up a separate bunch on questions concerning Blondie's sanity. She wondered if she could get Sweets to secretly analyze her. He wanted them together as much as the rest of them.

There was also something else that was off about her. Well, among the 20 other things that Cam had picked up on. This one was new.

It hit her when she saw Hannah again later that day.

She was wearing a chunky necklace.


	4. Hodgins

Hodgins had not noticed a thing. The reason he knew about the whole sunglasses thing was because Angela had mentioned it when they were driving home. For a while, he had not seen any significance in the matter, saying what's the big deal until Angela had corrected him with a slap upside the head and an explanation.

_Those aren't just sunglasses. They are a symbol. Think about it. What does she want with Brennan? What does she gain from getting them?_

Now that he thought about it, it was kind of creepy.

Why was Hannah wearing the glasses? It was disturbing. She had now started to wear the sunglasses on top of her head and necklaces like Brennan's. He had seen her with a bag from a store that sold that type of jewelry this afternoon. She had also been wearing a tank top and a jacket today. He had only noticed for the obvious reasons. It was just like the Brennan on a dig look.

Wait a second…

He got it, sitting up wildly.

There was a conspiracy afoot!

Hannah was slowly becoming like Brennan in order to ensure Booth would stay with her. She couldn't not know how he felt. A blind man could see it, as Clark had put it. Hannah wasn't stupid nor blind. And she was probably desperate at this point. So she would give him a Brennan that he could be with.

She had to be stopped.

There was no other solution. If they didn't stop her, she might start writing books and trying to solve murders.

Or even worse…

Kill Brennan and take over her life.

Hodgins had come up with many theories over the years but this was the only one that had a chance of coming to pass.


	5. Sweets

Something was totally off with Booth and Brennan.

Sweets had noticed the moment the pair had sat down. Booth didn't look very happy but Brennan was acting like everything was fine. It took Sweets a moment to realize that there was something wrong with her appearance. It was abnormally sunny out, which was weird for late January* but her sunglasses were not on her head.

"Hey Brennan, where are your sunglasses?" he asked in a friendly tone.

"I gave them to Hannah," she said calmly.

With that, Sweets choked on his water, nearly sending it at Booth, who didn't even seen to notice. Brennan didn't give people things. Angela, he could see doing that, but Brennan? Not to say she was selfish, but those sunglasses…she'd had them for as long as he could remember.

"You did?"

"I did. I visited her in the hospital and I didn't have a gift. She reminded me that it was social custom to give the infirm a gift. So I gave her the sunglasses."

That so did not sound right. Sweets had been in shrink game long enough to recognize that something was up with Hannah. It sounded like Brennan had just given her the sunglasses because there was nothing else to give. But that wasn't Brennan.

"And why the sunglasses?" Sweets asked.

"She asked me for them,"

"What?

"I didn't have a gift on my person, so she asked for the sunglasses."

Sweets had no words for that. That was something a spoiled child would do, not an accomplished woman. He wondered what Hannah's childhood and adolescence had been like. Maybe she was used to getting what she wanted just by asking or fluttering her eyelashes.

But still that was beyond weird. Anyway, Brennan had given her the greatest gift of all. Life. Some women would not have said anything and let her bleed out. But Brennan had saved her rival's life and she had been repaid by basically being robbed.

This was not right, not at all.

Xxx

*The timeline is weird. It's supposed to be winter, but in several episodes, it looks like summer. *cough Maggots in the Meathead cough* Never thought I'd say this but show some snow. It's driving me crazy! Can Hart Hanson and company see into the future? It better be that warm in January/February !

Oh and coming up next: Parker. I wasn't going to put him in but nertooold54 gave me the idea! Hats off to them!

I kept typing he instead of she when referring to Hannah and I wondered 'what if she used to be a man?'

Oh the insanity is endless.


	6. Interns

Note: I know I promised Parker *ducks flying chairs and various other objects* But I decided that this will wrap up soon, maybe in two or three chapters. Parker will be the story's lynchpin. He will be the one to wake up Booth. The interns are just fun.

Xxx

Clark did not notice a thing. He had been working when Angela had walked onto the platform and started to rant about Hannah. While he had never met the woman, he had heard enough about her and seen her on TV. The rant did nothing but annoy him.

Daisy hated Hannah Burely. Hated her guts. She was moving in on Brennan's territory. Everyone knew how Booth felt about Brennan and Hannah had taken him from under her nose. And she had taken her sunglasses. Daisy had a pair just like them.

Vincent had noticed the sunglasses but figured she had purchased them somewhere else. When he did heard how she got them, he did find it odd.

Fisher slept through everything.

Wendell thought Hannah was hot, which was the general opinion of the men of the lab. But he could tell she was a bit off. The whole sunglasses thing was weird, not to mention the fact she was not straightening her hair. Yes she was nuts.

And Arastoo had not been around to form an opining.


	7. Parker

Parker did not like this woman.

Her smile was too fake. It reminded him of a clown he had seen on TV. The clown had told a little boy 'We all float down here' and he half expected Hannah to say the same thing. She was pretty, with blond hair like his mom, but hers was straight with bangs. Like Bones'.

Parker liked Bones. He wished that she was his dad's girlfriend. This lady was treating him like a baby and Bones treated him like a grownup. She even used words he didn't understand, which was so much better than the baby talk Hannah was firing at him.

The sunglasses were perched on top of her head. Parker recognized them. They belonged to Bones. She had let him wear them once, when they had been at the park. And he saw them on her head all the time. Once, he had been listening his mom talk to someone on the phone and she had said something about his dad giving the sunglasses to Bones.

That made him think: you did not give someone else your gifts unless they were really ugly. And you did not give someone something that someone you loved gave you.

So, if one followed his logic, they did not belong to Hannah.

Parker was only nine and a half* but even he knew that this was wrong.

"How did you get Bones' sunglasses?" he asked when his dad went to the bathroom.

"She gave them to me," Hannah answered, taken aback by his question.

"Why?"

"I asked for them."

"Why?"

She had no answer for that.

Xxx

*Note: Hey they never tell us how old he is. In Season 1 Parker is mentioned as being 4. So now five years later plus a couple months, he should be around nine.

One more chapter…where Booth will finally wake up, Angela does what she does best and a Wizard Of Oz reference!


	8. Planning

Note: This chapter is an expanded version of another story 'Interns'

I have no idea how to end this.

Xxx

Daisy had sent out the mass text the day before. All the interns were to meet at the Royal Diner at eight the next night. She would reveal the reason when they were all there. Curious, all of them came, even Clark. Well, he had been seen by Wendell and had been dragged in.

"You all may be curious as to why I called you all here," Daisy said when their food came.

"What do you want?" Clark asked.

"It's about Dr. Brennan," Daisy ignored his rudeness. "Ever since Agent Booth moved in with that woman, she has been moody, irrational, even downright mean.

"So you believe her mood is tied to Agent Booth's relationship?" Arastoo asked.

"Yes. So we have to do something about it," Daisy said.

"Agent Booth is happy. I do not think it would be a wise idea to 'mess with him'," Vincent piped up.

"But he isn't!" Daisy glared at Vincent. "He belongs with Dr. Brennan."

"So what are you suggesting?" Arastoo asked.

"That we get rid of her," Daisy stated simply.

Crickets.

The men stared at her, except for Fisher, who had fallen asleep on his plate. His snort jolted the rest of them back to reality.

"You want us to kill her?" Wendell was amazed.

"I'm getting out of here," Clark muttered.

"Stay," Daisy hissed. Clark sat right back down. "I am not suggesting murder. I am merely saying we get rid of her. Combined, we have an IQ of nearly 800. We can figure out a way to make sure she never darkens our doorways again."

"Why?" Arastoo asked.

"Because, we are Dr. Brennan's interns. And her mood effects her work, which means it will effect ours. A happy Dr. Brennan equals awards, praise, top assignments, and excellent references."

Fisher began to snore.

"Only 6000 people get away with murder per year and only 37 percent of murders are unsolved. The odds are not in our favor," Vincent rambled.

"We are brilliant. We could get away with it," Daisy said.

"I want no part in this," Clark muttered.

"You don't have to do anything. Just agree to not rat us out."

"Fine."

"So, what's the plan?" Wendell asked.

"You're in?" Daisy grinned.

"Happy Brennan equals happy us," he shrugged.

"I'm in as well," Arastoo said.

"I guess I have no choice," Vincent mumbled.

Fisher snored.

The rest of the team arrived a few minutes later.

"Anyone have a plan yet?" Angela asked.

"Daisy wants to kill her," Vincent blurted out.

"I never said 'kill' Daisy held up her hands.

"Here are the rules," Cam stated. "No guns, no bazookas, no sling shots. No fire, no liquid nitrogen, no lasers. No midgets, no canons, no animals. And NO, I repeat, no poison."

"Then what are we supposed to do?" Daisy asked, pouting.

"I vote we stuff her skinny ass into a box and mail her back to Iraq," Angela muttered. "Sorry…hormones."

"Let's put that in the 'maybe' pile," Cam said.

"Why don't we just confront her?" Wendell asked.

"Brilliant!" Hodgins said. "Can I go home?"

"No!" Daisy and Angela yelled. "We have much to discuss…"

Xxx

SOS

Major help needed


	9. Chapter 9

_The Final Chapter_

"_**Daddy, is it okay to asked someone for something?" Parker said.**_

"_**What do you mean?" Booth asked.**_

"_**I mean, Hannah asked Bones for her sunglasses for no reason. So I was wondering if that's okay."**_

_**Booth frowned. He was at the diner with his son. His mother had a work emergency and had dropped him off there. He had a session with Sweets in less than 15 minutes. He could probably leave him with a squint. Sweets said that the session wouldn't be too long. **_

"_**No, it's not," Booth said. **_

"_**Then how come Hannah did it?" Parker asked as he finished his pie.**_

"_**I don't know. But it was wrong."**_

_**A few minutes later, it was time to go to the Jeffersonian. Today, for some reason, the session would be held at the lab. Cam's daughter was in her mother's office and Booth left Parker with her.**_

_**Crowded inside the conference room were Sweets, Brennan, Angela, Cam, Hodgins and….Hannah?**_

"_**Hannah, what are you doing here?" Booth asked.**_

"_**This is an intervention," Sweets said.**_

"_**Why is Hannah here?" Booth asked.**_

"_**Look at her," Angela said and got up to wheel Hannah's chair over to Brennan's. "It's so Single White Female.**_**."**

"**I don't see it," Booth mumbled.**

"**Dude…the same haircut, similar clothes. Soon, she's going to dye her hair and don a lab coat. but not before Brennan 'disappears'!" Hodgins rambled, **

"**Look at this!" Cam reached into the CVS bag that had been hanging off Hannah's chair. Inside was a box of hair dye. "She's trying to become Brennan!" The whole time, Hannah's eyes were darting back and forth, like she was looking for an escape. **

"**Hannah is this true?" Booth asked. **

"**So what if it is?" Hannah yelled. "You aren't going to stop loving her? And I can give you Bones. Just not with all the big words and that stupid dead body smell!"**

"**I do not smell like dead bodies!" Brennan said, moving her chair away.**

"**Yes you do!" Hannah screamed back.**

"**She smells like jasmine with a hint of anti-septic," Booth said dreamily. **

"**SEE?" Hannah jumped out of her seat and charged at Brennan. **

**Suddenly, the doors opened and Daisy jumped in, holding a potato launcher. She aimed it at Hannah and fired. The blond went down. Wendell came in and dragged her out, Hannah's head smacking the wall a few twice.**

"**What did I say?" Cam asked, rolling her eyes.**

"**You never said anything about these," Daisy said. "I altered it. Don't worry, she's just unconscious," **

**Brennan walked up to her partner. "Booth, I know you love Hannah, but I just wanted to tell you that I changed by mind. I want to 'give us a shot' to use your words-"**

**Booth kissed her. They all clapped. **

"**Okay Jack, get the crate," Angela said.**

**And Hannah Burely was never seen or heard from again.**

**They all lived happily ever after.**

**Xxx**

**Oh for those who didn't get the single white female reference, it is a movie where this woman's new roommate turns out to be nuts and tries to take over her life.**

**Thanks for reading!**


End file.
